Living Together Before Marriage

It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable…  1 Thessalonians4:3-4

Some people that have gone through a divorce say they want to “play it safe” and live with the person they are now in a relationship with rather than getting married first.  This topic came at a good time for me because my 15 year old son asked me why people can’t live with their boyfriend or girlfriend before marriage.  I knew he wasn’t going to accept my simple answer, “well, you just shouldn’t and God doesn’t like it”.  He’s the type of kid that wants details.  This led me to days of investigation.  It wasn’t an easy topic like I thought it was going to be.

My sister-n-law from Texas is a caring, beautiful, southern speaking and loving person married to my younger brother. I love what she had to say about living together before marriage:

“You know how you wake up Christmas morning and you see all those presents under the tree and you are just so excited?  Well, imagine if you had peeked at the presents before they were wrapped.  When you awakened Christmas morning you wouldn’t be so excited to open up the presents.  That’s how it is if you live with the person before you marry them, you just don’t experience the honeymoon and all the excitement.”

God would like us to marry first before living together.  He believes marriage is to be honored.  A wonderful marriage is a gift from God.  When you involve God from the beginning it will be blessed. You may be reading this and don’t think a whole lot of marriage right now.  I too at one time thought it was impossible to find a soul mate and never thought I would ever get married again.  But, if God’s will is to send you a soul mate then you will want to honor Him in every way.  If the person is not sent from God you will not want to live with the person.  If you wait to live together with the person God sends you, God will bless you and your soul mate.


Dear Lord,

Please help me understand why I should wait to live with my soul mate.  Please give me the strength to abstain until after I am married.  Please show me if this relationship is not your will.  I only want to do what pleases you Lord.

In your Holy Name.  Amen.

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